


batman and robin are gay

by WeAreNeverGoingOutOfStile



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Chatting & Messaging, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Heather comes in later don’t worry y’all, Humor, I want to stay away from angst but that might not be possible in order to sustain the story, M/M, a good boi for steve ;))), all the characters will probably be ooc and i’m so sorry IM NOT GOOD AT THIS, billy is a good boi in this, even if it seems like they’re not, except jancy they stan kpop with all their hearts, i can’t leave my girl robin loveless, if there is angst there will always be a happy ending dw, is this just a place for me to deposit my love for billy hargrove?, nancy & billy are best friends, nancy is amazing im love her, rated m bc of all the swearing and jokes hh, robin & steve are best buds, steve is a confident and panicked gay at the same time, the party may come in later idk, they all stan kpop but lowkey, you bet your ass it is
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-15
Updated: 2019-11-15
Packaged: 2021-01-31 10:43:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21444925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WeAreNeverGoingOutOfStile/pseuds/WeAreNeverGoingOutOfStile
Summary: Jonathan Byers:Who knew Billy liked vinesNancy Wheeler:who knew billy liked anythingmy name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:I like your ex’s dickbatman:i-robin:BILLY OMFG SWOENRNDBKEKA
Relationships: Billy Hargrove/Steve Harrington, Jonathan Byers/Nancy Wheeler, Robin Buckley/Heather Holloway
Comments: 6
Kudos: 61





	1. jonathan likes nannys

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so i literally just sat down and decided to try to write a gc fic because they’re my life support. i don’t want to promise quick updates because i never know if i’ll have the time but hopefully all goes well and i’m able to keep this going ❤️

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jonathan Byers:  
i love you nanny
> 
> robin:  
NANNY
> 
> Jonathan Byers:  
I MEANT NANCY
> 
> robin:  
HOW DOES ONE GO TO TYPE NANCY AND ACCIDENTALLY TYPE NANNY

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idk aH

Steve Harrington has created a group chat

Steve Harrington has added Robin Buckley, Billy Hargrove, Nancy Wheeler, and 1 other to the group chat

Billy Hargrove:  
No.

Billy Hargrove has left the group

Steve Harrington:  
that bitch 

Steve Harrington has added Billy Hargrove to the group 

Billy Hargrove:  
No.

Billy Hargrove has left the group

Steve Harrington has added Billy Hargrove to the group

Billy Hargrove has left the group

Steve Harrington has added Billy Hargrove to the group

Billy Hargrove has left the group

Steve Harrington has added Billy Hargrove to the group

Billy Hargrove:  
BITCH STOP

Steve Harrington:  
THEN STOP LEAVING THE GROUP HOE

Billy Hargrove:  
WHY DID YOU EVEN MAKE A GC WE LIVE IN THE SAME FUCKING NEIGHBORHOOD 

Steve Harrington:  
ITS NOT LIKE YOU EVER FUCKING VISIT ME MAYBE I JUST WANT TO TALK TO MY BESTIES VIA GROUP CHAT

Robin Buckley:   
you consider me to be one of your besties?? im cryin :’))

Steve Harrington:   
of course i do! we’re batman and robin  
LITERALLY   
I AM MAN WITH BAT AND YOU ARE ROBIN

Robin Buckley:  
G A S P

Robin Buckley has changed Steve Harrington’s name to batman

Robin Buckley has changed her name to robin

batman:   
YES

Nancy Wheeler:  
Is Jonathan here?

Jonathan Byers:  
Yes baby

robin:  
AW

Billy Hargrove has changed his name to my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow

Jonathan Byers:  
Who knew Billy liked vines

Nancy Wheeler:  
who knew billy liked anything 

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
I like your ex’s dick

batman:  
i-

robin:  
BILLY OMFG SWOENRNDBKEKA

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow has named the chat to nancy’s mom is hot

Nancy Wheeler:  
absolutely not, take this down immediately or i’ll contact my lawyer 

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
let’s do it baby i know the law

Jonathan Byers:  
screeeEEEEEECH THATS MY BABY

Nancy Wheeler:  
hh  
i love you jon

Jonathan Byers:  
i love you nanny

robin:   
NANNY

batman:  
NANNY

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
NANNY

Nancy Wheeler:   
NANNY

Jonathan Byers:  
I MEANT NANCY

robin:  
HOW DOES ONE GO TO TYPE NANCY AND ACCIDENTALLY TYPE NANNY

Jonathan Byers:  
IT WAS AUTOCORRECT BINCH

batman:  
THERES NO WAY THAT WAS AUTOCORRECT 

robin has renamed the chat to jonathan’s nanny kink

batman:  
NWNEJEJENENE IM-

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:   
hhhHHH

Nancy Wheeler:  
IM CRY LAUGHING HELP ME WEEWOOWEEWOO

Jonathan Byers:  
this is HARMFUL TO MY MENTALITY I AM FRAGILE   
STOP WITH THE SLANDER 2k19

Nancy Wheeler:  
THIS IS NOT SLANDER THIS IS REAL

Jonathan Byers:  
ITS ABOUT AS REAL AS “DEMODOGS”

batman:  
i-

Nancy Wheeler:  
has anyone else noticed that the face of a demodog kinda looks like a tampon?

batman:  
Y E S

Nancy Wheeler:  
steve how do you know what a tampon looks like you’ve probably never even touched one let alone had one in your body to see the top covered in period blood

batman:   
first of all, ew  
second of all, you don’t know what i’ve had inside my body 👀👀

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:   
she doesn’t but i do ;)) 

robin:  
AW

Jonathan Byers:  
GAG   
DADS STOP

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
so a nanny kink AND a daddy kink huh?

Jonathan Byers:   
NO SHUT YOUR FACE BIYCH

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
well then

Jonathan Byers changed his name to JonaTEN

JonaTEN:   
because i’m a ten 

Nancy Wheeler:  
He wants you all to think he changed it to that because he’s a ten but it’s really because Jonten is his favorite ship in Nct

JonaTEN:  
SHUT

Nancy Wheeler:   
NO THE PEOPLE NEED TO KNOW THE TRUTH

robin:   
jon we won’t judge you for your music taste we aren’t those types of friends/people plus kpop isn’t anything to be ashamed of 

batman:  
personally i stan bts and monsta x 

jonaTEN:  
omg i’m gonna cry ily guys

Nancy Wheeler:  
we love you too bby

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so likeee  
if anyone wants to be in a random ass gc that would be pretty cool  
maybe on discord? idk i just like the thought of having a gc full of people ya know? bc who actually has a lot friends right


	2. nancy is THAT bitch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nancy Wheeler has changed her name to the bitch that gets shit done
> 
> the bitch that gets shit done:  
because it’s true
> 
> batman:   
i can’t deny this
> 
> my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
i can’t either, if it weren’t for nance steve and i would probably still be eyefucking each other   
vividly   
and violently

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i’m tryin to add at least a couple chapters hhhh

jonathan’s nanny kink

robin:  
why am i the only single one in this chat  
was this intentional? did i offend the universe somehow? woe is me

batman:  
dramatic much 

robin:   
well excuse me steven but while your dick is getting sucked i’m stuck alone in my room being bored as hell

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
i’m not even at his house

robin:   
did i say you were the one sucking his dick?

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
no but you know i do

robin:  
unfortunately 

batman:  
wait WHAT

robin:   
so anygays how about we find me a mans

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
rob ur a lesbian 

robin:   
exactly 

batman:  
your mentality never fails to confuse and frighten me

Nancy Wheeler has added Heather Holloway to the chat

Nancy Wheeler has changed Heather Holloway’s name to HeatherinLeather

HeatherinLeather:   
why tho

Nancy Wheeler:  
because robin told me that’s what she thinks about at night 

robin:  
WHAYBNOR ID IDKR

Nancy Wheeler:  
YES YOU DID

robin:  
NO  
HEARHER I LROMICW I DIDNR

HeatherinLeather:  
lol it’s okay, it’s cute

robin:  
NWNEJEIEIEJEIEYYW 

Nancy Wheeler has changed her name to the bitch that gets shit done

the bitch that gets shit done:  
because it’s true

batman:   
i can’t deny this

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
i can’t either, if it weren’t for nance steve and i would probably still be eyefucking each other   
vividly   
and violently 

batman:   
billy baby remember our talk about using your words a little too much?

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
yes

batman:  
this is one of those times

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
sowwy daddy

jonaTEN:   
OH SO I SAY DAD AND I SUDDENLY HAVE A DADDY KINK

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
NO YOU SUDDENLY HAVE A DADDY KINK WHEN YOU CALL TWO GAY GUYS DAD

jonaTEN:   
FUK U BRO

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
THATS STEVES JOB BACK OFF

the bitch that gets shit done:  
HAHAHAHA

jonaTEN:  
FUK U NANCY

the bitch that gets shit done:  
time and place?

jonaTEN:   
NQOEJENEB

robin:   
who’s gonna fuk me :’((((

HeatherinLeather:  
i will ;))))

robin:   
WJEJEJNEENBD O K A Y

private message: robin & nancy 

robin:  
HEJWJENE T H A N K Y O U

nancy:   
YOURE WELCOME THIS IS SO CUTE


	3. hide your wives from johnny seo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> jonaTEN:  
KWKEJERNRB I CANT I-
> 
> the bitch that gets shit done:  
he’s watching a 1 hour compilation of johnny saying “oh daddy” 
> 
> batman:  
I LOVE THAT VIDEO
> 
> jonaTEN:  
IWJWKENEBEBE AAAAAAAHEHWJ
> 
> batman:  
i think jonathan just died
> 
> the bitch that gets shit done:  
ah, johnny seo, the wife killer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the weird thingy with the emojis won’t go away no matter how many times i try to edit IM SORRY

jonathan’s nanny kink

jonaTEN:  
guys can we pls change the chat name i h8 it

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
it’s 9 in the morning on a saturday why would we change the name

jonaTEN:  
why the fuck does the time and day matter 

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
it doesn’t i just don’t wanna change the name

jonaTEN:  
billy pls

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
ugh fine

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow has renamed the chat we young✌️🤘we hot 🥵 🔥 so what 🤷🏻♀️🖕

jonaTEN:  
somehow that’s not worse thank u

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
all in a days work

batman:   
what’s up my bitches

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
b-but i thought i was your bitch

batman:   
omg  
baby you are my only bitch

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
your previous message says otherwise   
WhAt’S uP mY bItChEs

batman:   
bABY I PROMISE IT MEANT NOTHING   
IT WAS A MISTAKE   
YOURE MY BEST AND ONLY BITCH

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
promise?

batman:  
i promise baby boy

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:  
hh

batman:  
you like that huh? 

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:   
jejejwn hhhhh

robin:   
go be gay somewhere else you heathens

HeatherinLeather:  
and you’re not gay?

robin:  
what no i’m so gay im the gayest of them all i’m gay gay gay  
GAY

HeatherinLeather:  
Cute.

robin:  
wjwjwjwooe

the bitch that gets shit done:  
this is so amusing i love it

jonaTEN:  
JWWJJWNENENEJE

batman:  
WHAT

jonaTEN:  
KWKEJERNRB I CANT I-

the bitch that gets shit done:  
he’s watching a 1 hour compilation of johnny saying “oh daddy” 

batman:  
I LOVE THAT VIDEO

jonaTEN:  
IWJWKENEBEBE AAAAAAAHEHWJ

batman:  
i think jonathan just died

the bitch that gets shit done:  
ah, johnny seo, the wife killer

jonaTEN:  
jsjw w i f e?  
nance did you just propose?!

the bitch that gets shit done:  
whoopsie gotta blast 

jonaTEN:  
DONT YOU DARE LEAVE ME IM FRAGILE RN

the bitch that gets shit done:  
YOURE ALWAYS FRAGILE THIS ISNT NEW

jonaTEN:   
WOW JUST W O W


	4. what the hell is a yoongi?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the bitch that gets shit done:  
ANYGAYS  
y’all are koreaboos
> 
> robin:  
bitch please we all know you’d let yoongi drop kick you and then fry you in some grease 
> 
> the bitch that gets shit done:  
u right
> 
> robin:  
wbk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you can probably tell i’m projecting my love for kpop onto these hets & homos

private message: heather & robin

heather:   
Hey so like, do you want to go out sometime?

robin:   
like out as in a date or out as in friends hanging out?  
omg  
that was so forward IM SORRY  
IM SO SORRY PLEASE DONT FEEL PRESSURED TO ANSWER

heather:  
Omg  
No it wasn’t dONT WORRY LOL  
I’m asking you out on a date, as in us two going out on a date-date date. Is that okay?

robin:  
hh  
YES  
ITS SO OKAY  
I WOULD LOVE TO

heather:  
Yay!! I’m so excited! Is next weekend okay? I can take you to this little diner that I used to go to with my mom when I was younger. I have always wanted to go there for a first date.

robin:  
yes yes yes YES

heather:  
Lol, you’re so cute. I’ll pick you up at 10 a.m on Saturday, if that’s okay? The diner closes early in the afternoon.

robin:  
it’s a date! 

private message: robin and nancy

robin:  
WHY AM I SO AWKWARD NWKWKEKE

nancy:  
I DONT KNOW

robin:   
i-  
I HAVNT TOLD YOU WHY I WAS AWKWARD YET

nancy:  
OH  
OOPS

robin:  
NEVERMIND THEN

nancy:   
NO ROB PLEASE TELL ME ILY

robin:  
OKAY   
(robin&heatherscreenshots.jpg)

nancy:  
OMG  
AWWWW  
YOU TWO ARWNSO CUYE IM CRUINH

robin:  
JWJWJWNE THANK YIH ALWKEKD

nancy:   
I CANT WAIT TO SEE WHERE THIS GOES AAAAAAA

robin:  
KWKEMENE ME E I T H E R

nancy:  
PLEASE KEEP ME UPDATED I LOVE THIS SO MUCH

robin:  
OF COURSE NANCE ILY

nancy:  
ILY2

we young✌️🤘we hot 🥵 🔥 so what 🤷🏻♀️🖕

batman:  
is it too much to ask for wonho to just snap my entire neck   
like pls dad 

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:   
me but @ namjoon   
have you seen his arms?  
i would gladly let him become my new dad and beat me up

batman:  
BILLY

robin:  
BILLY

the bitch that gets shit done:  
BILLY

jonaTEN:  
BILLY

HeatherinLeather:  
I don’t know why we’re all yelling at Billy but I want to be included   
BILLY

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:   
let’s just say the dad thing is a lil too real

HeatherinLeather:  
Oh fuck  
Billy I’m so fucking sorry

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:   
pls no pity i’m fine 

HeatherinLeather:  
Billy, if you ever need to talk, I’m here. Not that you don’t talk to Steve or Robin or Nancy or Jonathan. You know what I mean

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:   
i do, thanks heather. i appreciate that.

the bitch that gets shit done:  
ANYGAYS  
y’all are koreaboos

robin:  
bitch please we all know you’d let yoongi drop kick you and then fry you in some grease 

the bitch that gets shit done:  
u right

robin:   
wbk 

HeatherinLeather:  
What the hell is a yoongi?

the bitch that gets shit done:  
GASP

jonaTEN:  
GASP

batman:  
GASP

robin:  
prepare yourself heather

the bitch that gets shit done:  
HES SO PRETTY  
AND BEAUTIFUL   
AND GORGEOUS   
AND BREATHTAKING   
AND STUNNING

batman:  
those all mean the same thing nance

the bitch that gets shit done:  
YEAH THEY ALL MEAN YOONGI  
SHUT UP HOE

batman:  
OKAY SORRY MOM

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:   
a mommy kink huh?

batman:  
SHUT UP BILLY

the bitch that gets shit done:  
SHUT UP BILLY

my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow:   
wow


	5. billy’s cheekies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Waitress:   
I’ve seen said face before, he usually makes it when a parent yells at a kid at the pool, and not to take away from why he’s scowling but it’s so adorable i just want to pinch his cheekies 
> 
> Charlie:  
cheekies
> 
> The Waitress:   
I said what I said

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Name Changes
> 
> Steve: Frank  
Nancy: Dee  
Billy: Dennis  
Jonathan: Mac  
Robin: Charlie  
Heather: The Waitress

private message: billy and nancy

willybilly:   
thank you for changing the subject earlier 

fancynancy:   
you don’t need to thank me billy, i know new people acting all nice and stuff can sometimes make you feel weird 

willybilly:   
i don’t even know why tho. why do i crave the niceness of others but get so awkward when i get it?

fancynancy:   
because your dad is a piece of shit who’s made your life a living hell and given you incredibly strong trust issues. billy you are valid for wanting human affection and you are valid for being uncomfortable receiving it, and it’s not all the time, just from new people.

willybilly:   
you gieu arw so nicw to mw 

fancynancy: billy? are you okay?

willybilly:   
im cruinh

fancynancy:   
billy i know you. i know you’re thinking you’re undeserving of the love we give you, but you’re not. yeah, you did lash out at us at the beginning, and that was wrong but we know why you reacted the way you did. victims of abuse aren’t going to be all peachy, they were made to live in constant fear, so of course they are going to react a certain way. you’ve changed though, you’ve taken the initiative to get better, and we couldn’t be more proud of you.

willybilly:  
nabcy csn i plewas coem obwr 

fancynancy:  
i’m already setting up the tv for a movie night

willybilly:  
ily

fancynancy:   
ily2

private message: nancy and jonathan 

ten’s valley girl accent:  
hey bby billy is coming over for a movie night

john’s banana:   
is he okay? should i come over or bring anything? 

ten’s valley girl accent:   
i think we’re all set, thank you for making sure tho

john’s banana:  
you don’t need to thank me babe, text or call if you need anything 

ten’s valley girl accent:  
i will ilysm

john’s banana:   
ilysmm

private message: billy and steve

i’m baby:   
steve im going over to nancy’s house, is that oksy 

i’m daddy:   
of course it is bills, may i ask why tho?

i’m baby:   
i thabked her for changing thw subjeft earlier and she said reallu nibe thinhs amd now i’m crinh 

i’m daddy:  
that was so so sweet of her awww  
i’m totally not opposed to you going over there but i am opposed to you driving over there with how you are now, i’m leaving rn to pick you up, i’ll be there in 10

i’m baby:  
stevie yuo doen havreto 

i’m daddy:   
i’m in my car baby, get ready to go

i’m baby:  
okwy 

we young✌️🤘we hot 🥵 🔥 so what 🤷🏻♀️🖕

robin has renamed the chat The Gang

robin has changed her name to Charlie

Charlie has changed HeatherinLeather’s name to The Waitress

Charlie has changed jonaTEN’s name to Mac

Charlie has changed my name is trey and i have a basketball game tomorrow’s name to Dennis

Charlie has changed bitch that gets shit done’s name to Dee

Charlie has changed batsman’s name to Frank

Charlie:  
i’m a genius and y’all can suq madiq

The Waitress:  
Gladly ;))))

Frank:  
doesn’t the waitress hate charlie tho? if so the. heather as the waitress doesn’t make sense 

Charlie:  
did you just question my decision?

Frank:  
no sir

Charlie:  
oh i think you did

Frank:  
no sir

Charlie:  
that’s what i thought bITCH

Frank:  
yes sir

Mac:  
who are these people 

Charlie:  
G A S P

Frank:  
jonathan you bitch why would you get her started 

Mac:  
JWJW I D I D N T K N O W

Frank:  
FUK U

Mac:  
NO

Charlie:  
the characters i have named us all ayer are from a show called It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, and since there’s six of them and six of us, i think it works out pretty damn well don’t you?

Frank:  
uhhh

Charlie:  
don’t you? :) 

Mac:  
never have i ever been more terrified of a smiley face

Charlie:  
good.

The Waitress:  
So anygays, i’m so not looking forward to school starting up again this year

Charlie:  
oh yeah you actually have another year before you graduate 

Frank:  
So does billy my poor bby

Robin:  
so steve, you always go after twinks huh?  
OMG  
OMG  
O M G  
BILLY COULD BE YOUR SUGAR BABY  
IS HE YOUR SUGAR BABY  
YOURE RICH   
HES BABY  
IT’S PERFECT 

Frank:  
Bills is not my sugar baby rob  
and don’t let him catch you calling him baby or he’ll do that grouchy scrunched up face he does when he gets in a negative mood

Charlie:  
do you think he realizes how not intimidating that face is  
at most he looks like grumpy cat 

The Waitress:   
I’ve seen said face before, he usually makes it when a parent yells at a kid at the pool, and not to take away from why he’s scowling but it’s so adorable i just want to pinch his cheekies 

Charlie:  
cheekies

Frank:  
cheekies

Mac:  
cheekies

The Waitress:   
I said what I said

Frank:  
which cheekies tho, both sets are full and round and perfect to hold

Charlie:  
methinks she means the ones you don’t usually have your mouth near ;)  
wait  
you kiss him tho  
so your mouth is near both sets  
NEVER MIND

Frank:  
ROBIN WHAT ARE YOH INSINUATING 

Charlie:  
NOTHING

Frank:  
ROBIN WJWJWJEJ

Mac:  
y’all are losers she’s insinuating that you eat him out DUH

Charlie:  
KWOWKEJ JONATHAN 

Mac:  
AM I WRONG

Frank:  
on whether she’s insinuating that i eat billy out or the fact that i eat billy out?  
because both are true ;)

Frank has been removed from the chat

Charlie:  
i can’t tell if my tears are from sadness that he’s gone or relief

Mac:  
it’s probably both 

Charlie:  
u right 

Frank has been added to the chat

Frank:   
BITCH

Mac:  
HA comedy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as another day goes by i still have no idea what i’m doing


	6. johnny johnny? yes papa. adopting children? yes papa.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mac:  
GASP  
back off you disgusting heathen you shall clap our sons cheeks no more
> 
> Dee:  
jon there are some things you probably just shouldn’t say 
> 
> Mac:  
you can’t tell me how to parent my son

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> help

private message: steve and nancy

nance:  
steve STEVE IM CRYING HES SO CUTE

stebe:  
WHAT  
ARE YOU TWO OKAY 

nance:  
so i message you “steve steve he’s so cute i’m crying” and you think something’s wrong?

stebe:  
STUT UP IM A NATURAL WORRIER

nance:  
sigh  
WHATEVER BUT SERIOUSLY YOUR BOYFRIEND IS ADORABLE 

stebe:  
WBK PLS SHARE

nance:  
OKAY SO WE’RE WATCHING SUPERNATURAL 

stebe:  
I THOUGHT IT WAS GONNA BE A MOVIE NIGHT

nance:  
SHUT UP BITCH SAM ANS DEAN MAKE EVERYTHING BETTER

stebe:  
I CANT ARGUE WITH THAT

nance:  
YOU BET YOUR THICC ASS YOU CANT  
SO ANYWAY WE’RE WATCHING SPN AND IT’S THE EPISODE WHERE THEYRE IN THAT ONE MENTAL HOSPITAL 

stebe:  
ISNT THAT ALL OF THEM THO

nance:  
DEAN TAKES HIS PANTS OFF AND SAYS PUDDING

stebe:  
GOTCHA

nance:  
SO THAT PART CAME ON AMD BILLY JUST LOSES HIS SHIT LIKE FULL ON UNCONTROLLABLE GIGGLING AND DOING THAT ONE BREATHY LAUGH HE DOES

stebe:  
DID YOU SAY G I G G L I N G?

nance:  
Y E S

stebe:  
REEEEEEEEEE

nance:  
I KNOWWW  
ANYWAY HES JUST LAUGHIN HIS ENTIRE ASS OFF AND THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN HE JUST STARTED HICCUPING   
SO HES LAUGHING AND THEN HICCUPING OVER AND OVER AND THAT SENDS ME INTO A LAUGHING FIT

stebe:  
OMFG

nance:  
I KNOW  
SO WEVE CALMED DOWN AND NOW HES JUST LAYING ON TOP OF ME WHILE I PLAY WITH HIS HAIR

stebe:  
hh HES SO CUTE I CANT

nance:  
ME EITHER I WANT TO PROTECT HIM FROM EVERYTHING 

stebe:  
BITCH SAME

The Gang

Dee:  
billy is my baby all y’all can sit tf down

Mac:  
b-but

Frank:  
did you just stutter through text?

Mac:  
DiD yOu JuSt StUtTeR tHrOuGh TeXt?

Frank:  
listen here you little bitch i’ll eat your face

Mac:  
sᴏʷʷʸ ᴅᵃᴅᵈʏ

Frank:  
my nut just nutted

Mac:  
gross

Frank:  
you literally just called me daddy

Mac:  
i’m just an innocent boy that misses his daddy you pervert 

Frank:  
oop

Mac:  
anyways nancy i thought we were forever   
i thought our love was strong enough to overcome all obstacles i thought we were the exception to the rule 

Dee:  
baby we are  
you’re my bf baby billy is my adopted grown up child baby

Mac:  
i-i’m a dad?

Frank:  
again with the stuttering through text

Dee:  
yes baby you are  
you’re the father of a newborn 18 year old

Mac:  
i’m gonna cry i’m so proud of us

Dee:  
me too baby, me too

Frank:  
i feel like i’ve just lost my boyfriend to my ex and her boyfriend 

Dee:  
what boyfriend? our son isn’t allowed to date 

Frank:  
i’ve literally had sex with my boyfriend we’ve done more than just date

Mac:  
GASP  
back off you disgusting heathen you shall clap our sons cheeks no more

Dee:  
jon there are some things you probably just shouldn’t say 

Mac:  
you can’t tell me how to parent my son

Charlie:  
wait what  
you guys have a son?  
what did i miss

Frank:  
scroll up hoe

Charlie:  
mcscuse me bitch

Frank:  
scroll up you beautiful lesbian 

Charlie:  
thx  
omg  
wow steve you got your bf stolen from your ex and the guy that stole your ex from you

Frank:  
too soon

Charlie:  
steve it’s been like an entire year 

Frank:  
tOo SoOn

Charlie:  
OKAY

The Waitress:  
i love how we all just collectively love billy as if he were our son 

Frank:  
ahem

The Waitress:  
as our son and steve’s boyfriend*

Frank:  
good lifeguard 

Charlie:  
that’s my lifeguard get your own

Frank:  
i have my own dumbass

Charlie:  
leave me alone

Mac:  
she’s too gay to function 

Frank:  
did you seriously just reference mean girls?

Mac:  
yaes

Frank:  
you beautiful bastard

Mac:  
thx

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> help x2


End file.
